"No, Antonio! It's too sexy!" "But I must."
This week’s pick was for a long while shrouded in mystery, but that should be no reason for frustration. Smug Bastard transcends individual movies; it is the glow that we bask in, a light emanating from fundamental principles that can never get dated. Power. Skill. Manship. Mild Sauce.
As anyone who’s tried to procure a movie at a south side rental store knows, the selection can be very frustrating. That I avoided both Ice Cube and Raven Symone was an admirable feat. And now, the movie.
Let me get the first criticism out of the way: Desperado is a good movie. Robert Rodriguez has made some stinkers, but this one is legit. However, there’s plenty to enjoy that wasn’t intended: Tarantino trying to act, some terrible mustaches, Cheech, and a bad guy-second in command relationship that brings more sexual tension than a Bruce Pearl interview. We also get Salma Hayek, who–while certainly no slouch today–nearly caused my 17-year-old head to explode when I first saw the sex scene that will have smug bastards everywhere crossing their legs to avoid showing their broners.
I, on the other hand, will be wearing sweatpants.
SD
